November 12, 2015


It ain't no point to me waking up,
everybody's time I'm taking up,
I got nobody, it ain't a shoulder near,
I can't stay here and it's colder there,
I don't wanna look back cause it's gonna hurt,
I slice my wrist and it's gonna squirt,
For me everybody holds a hate,
I got backstabbed and everybody holds the stake,
it's no roads to take I'm in a circle drive,
bustin' at myself and I'm tryna survive,
I'll disappoint you, and I will let you down,
and I ain't got many home boys comin' round,
you don't understand so don't say you do,
I swear I'll put a mother fuckin' slug in you,
I'm the only one, the lonely one,
and at home loading a gun thinking why not?

I got court comin' up, I stole a truck,
I got a bitch pregnant and I'm broke as fuck,
I wanna get high but i got piss test,
I'm always first name on top of the shit list,
get this, the witch has made my chest,
it's permanent nightly visiting nest,
it ain't no clothes I look good in,
I'm the mother fuckin' big red train that couldn't,
I got no family I stole they shit,
restraining orders and I still won't quit,
I hit rock bottom, and I fell in a hole,
and I fell through the floor of that hole some more,
I been missin for a year, nobody's lookin',
I got beat down and my shit tookin',
I look ahead and all I see is more of the same
or this self inflicted bullet hole pouring my brain!

I dream about cuttin' heads off with a shovel,
the dreams are gettin' serious think I'm in trouble,
I don't hold memory for more than an hour,
I'm tire as fuck and I'm drained of power,
I ain't half way there and I'm outta time,
I'm like a crushed light bulb, all outta shine,
I been around the world but no place is home,
I wanna see the other side when I face this chrome,
I'm butt-naked, I been jackin' off gettin' drunk,
it's my last hours alive who gives a fuck?
It don't matter. I'm doing the shit in the garage,
tryna make it easier for them to clean my head splaage,
this bitch I loved, I hope she finds me,
still up in the chair with my thoughts behind me,

I'm about to do it,

Can you hold for a second...


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