Lyrics

If there's one thing I've learned in my many years of enforcing the laws of this city, It's that the journey down to Urinetown offers no surprises, not even from the very toughest among us. On that journey expect only... the expected.

And it's a hard, cold tumble of a journey
worthy of a gurney, a bumble down
A slapped face, smacked with a mace
certain to debase, it'sa stumble down
A path that leads you only one place
Horrible to retrace, a crumble down
A hard, cold tumble of a tourney
jumble of a journey to Urinetown
Julie Cassidy went to a field behind a tree
Saw there was no one who could see her pee
But me
and Jacob Rosenbloom thought he was safe up in his room
didn't know the jars he kept up there
would obligate a trip to a Urine-tomb
(laughs)
Oh there are those who think our method's vicious
overly malicious, a bunch of brutes
but it's we who gather for the people
tavern for the steeple, lawful fruits
our task, bring a little order
swindle out a hoarder from what he loots
as the book says, certainly a season
trample out a treason with hobnail boots
Roger Roosevelt kept a cup below his belt
cup ran over when he knelt
he smelt, we dealt
and Joseph Old Man Strong held his pee for much too long
hoped his son might bail him out
his guess was good but also wrong
(laughs)
Years past all lived in a jungle
scooping out a bungle, nature's bowl
Life of constant deprivation, certain aggravation took its toll
Soon learned power of the truncheon, organize a function king to pawn
So if peace is what you're after
Urinetown's the rafter to hang it on

Julie Cassidy
Jacob Rosebloom
Roger Roosevelt, Jacob Rosenbloom, Julie Cassidy
Joseph Old Man Strong

Don't be like them, don't be like them
don't be like them, don't be like them
Oh it's a hard, cold, tumble of a journey
Worthy of a gurney, a bumble down
A slapped face, smacked with a mace
Certain to debase is our stumble down
It's a path that leads you only one place
Horrible to retrace, a crumble down
A hard, cold, tumble of a tourney
Jumble of a journey to Urinetown

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